This is me with my couple of days old son, leaving the hospital. What emotions even looking at the picture!
I walked a long journey from here to learn how to be the mum of this fantastic baby boy. My old life, all my relationships as they were just fell apart and had to reborn from their ashes as a phoenix.
It is a transition, with the baby a new mother is also born and for me it was like learning to breathe again, I needed to figure out how to be a mum, a partner, a friend, a working woman. I needed to understand how to consciously take care of myself, both my body and my mind to be a better mum. I built a new life with new rules, new priorities as nothing was the same any more. This first year as a new mother was the most beautiful and also the most difficult year in my life.
Most mothers are like me, they do struggle to find a new balance when they become a new mother. There is so much happiness and love but also so much exhaustion and work to do. And somewhere between the diaper changes and the ideas on the perfect parenting you just lose who you were before but you can’t see clearly who you became.
For me it became easier when I made some important changes to be a happier person and therefore a better mum.
Me-time – my son was a couple of months old when I could start to do some sport again – I was so happy to be outside, playing beach volley for a couple of hours with some people who didn’t really cared about kids and I enjoyed both the sport and the adult small talk so much!
Prioritise – Very soon I felt that I became a housecleaning machine and I didn’t really like the feeling. I needed to think it over what tasks I could let go and not to frustrate myself any more.
Help – this is common sense but I actually needed to learn to accept help. We needed to lay our relationship dynamic on new basics with my partner so he took over more housework and I stopped being the martyr working without stopping. It takes a village to raise a child and it is such a wonderful approach, especially today with so much loneliness and isolation which impacts hard new mums. I needed to learn to accept the help of family and friends which was also a new discovery for me but helped me to spend some quality time with my partner or have some valuable me-time for me.
Consciousness – it is also kind of a me-time, but I started to use my time better. Instead of staring at social media on my mobile during breastfeeding I started to read or study. I made time regularly to meditate and practise gratitude.
Every mother and every family is different, but one thing is common: it is difficult for most of the new mums (all respect to the exception) and they need special attention and care to get over this life situation. With the new Mum's mental and physical wellbeing program I offer a package that works for all life situations, for all kind of mums. If you decide to not only survive this challenging time but you want to be able to enjoy this wonderful miracle, then contact me for a free consultation.